Whenever a lifeless opossum appears in my yard, I prefer to leave it for a day or so, just in case it’s playing possum. This approach has its drawbacks in warm weather, when 24 hours can bring about considerable decomposition. Even so, I’d rather deal with smelly remains than risk moving a wild animal that isn’t really dead. I don’t want to find out what an angry opossum might do with those nasty claws and teeth if it awoke from a fainting spell to find me carrying it away by its scaly, prehensile tail.

Unfortunately, my untrainable border collie, Chip, presents me with this dilemma on a regular basis. So far this year he’s brought in three, though one apparently recovered and escaped overnight.

Chip's always proud of himself, but I’d rather he left the poor opossums in peace. They have enough challenges in life since they’re born ugly and never get any cuter.

I’d prefer that the dog avoid dragging in dead critters of any kind, but I really wouldn’t mind if he’d chase off the raccoons that tear into our sweetcorn patch every year. Chipjust ignores them when they break through our electric fence and pull down ears to taste. I suppose he’s afraid to confront them since a raccoon once climbed on his head and tried to drown him in our pond.

Groundhogs could be another worthy target for our dog’s killer instincts. The neighborhood coyotes have cleaned up the groups in the outlying fields, but there are still plenty digging in the pastures near the barns. Our dog doesn’t seem interested in chasing them, even though they are clearly infringing on his territory, which he vigorously defends from other threats such as Fed Ex drivers, meter readers and Boy Scouts.

Perhaps I have unrealistic expectations because of the groundhog-killing dog my family had when I was a kid. Mort would kill 30 to 40 every year and had them eradicated for miles around. He never actually chased the groundhogs. Instead, he’d wait and watch for a groundhog to move away from its burrow. Then he’d run toward the burrow, not the groundhog. The panicked groundhog would try to run back to the burrow, but Mort had the timing figured out and he’d nab the groundhog before it could dive to safety. Good old Mort figured out that hunting strategy on his own, and I’m not sure how you could train another dog to do that.

I’m also not sure how to teach my dog to quit hunting down harmless opossums. He’s just not smart enough to overlook their appearance and appreciate their many good qualities. For instance, opossums eat ticks and other annoying insects, they kill rats and cockroaches and, unlike raccoons, they have natural immunity to rabies. They don’t even like to fight back when they’re threatened, but my Chip doesn’t seem to understand that it’s not sporting to kill another animal that is already acting dead.