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Sage shares wit on farm scents, M&Ms and aging from the farm side

In Life on the Farm Side, Birdsong shares on relating to yuppie Winer, a grandson, younger baldies and Ol’ JD.

John Vogel

August 30, 2016

1 Min Read

* “Cow boy” Bob was struggling to explain early morning farm scents to Merlo Winer so the yuppie could understand: “Think of it as a delicate blend of freshly cut young grass and sweet clover intermingled with a faint whiff of stocky moo-doo.”

* My 3-year-old grandson spotted a bag of M&Ms in my truck glovebox. “What’s that?” he asked.

“When you learn to read, you’ll know,” I replied as I tucked them away out of sight.

* If more parents saw who their kids were hanging out with, they’d be certain to spend more time with them.

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* “Somethin’ strange is happenin’,” sez I.M. Dum. “All the younger guys I know are sproutin’ gray hair or shaving their skulls.” Yup, they’re not so young no more, and the latter is a cover for it.

* Shaving bald may be trendy today, but chest hair tells the truth.

* Barn Bette asked Ol’ JD how old he was. “Almost 68,” he hedged. “But when I lose 40 pounds, I’ll be like 28.”

Rolling her eyes, she mumbled: “Fat chance!”

* I.R. Nutz wonders if he can get disability cuz “My ‘thinker’ can’t get outa granny gear.”

* Ever wonder why the newest, fanciest vacant buildings in town are often banks?

Jonathan Birdsong is a pen name for a Farm Progress editor.

About the Author(s)

John Vogel

Editor, American Agriculturist

For more than 38 years, John Vogel has been a Farm Progress editor writing for farmers from the Dakota prairies to the Eastern shores. Since 1985, he's been the editor of American Agriculturist – successor of three other Northeast magazines.

Raised on a grain and beef farm, he double-majored in Animal Science and Ag Journalism at Iowa State. His passion for helping farmers and farm management skills led to his family farm's first 209-bushel corn yield average in 1989.

John's personal and professional missions are an integral part of American Agriculturist's mission: To anticipate and explore tomorrow's farming needs and encourage positive change to keep family, profit and pride in farming.

John co-founded Pennsylvania Farm Link, a non-profit dedicated to helping young farmers start farming. It was responsible for creating three innovative state-supported low-interest loan programs and two "Farms for the Future" conferences.

His publications have received countless awards, including the 2000 Folio "Gold Award" for editorial excellence, the 2001 and 2008 National Association of Ag Journalists' Mackiewicz Award, several American Agricultural Editors' "Oscars" plus many ag media awards from the New York State Agricultural Society.

Vogel is a three-time winner of the Northeast Farm Communicators' Farm Communicator of the Year award. He's a National 4-H Foundation Distinguished Alumni and an honorary member of Alpha Zeta, and board member of Christian Farmers Outreach.

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