January 27, 2025

If you’ve ever thought to yourself, “My kids get along pretty well. I think they’ll work out the estate after I’m gone,” my advice is simple: Go buy the “for sale” sign now.
Making your children handle the succession of your farm on their own places too much pressure on them. There should be no decisions left to make after the funeral. Everything needs to be worked out ahead of time, but it requires you to act while you’re still alive.
Never underestimate the importance of your role as the head of your family. Taking the time now to facilitate those difficult discussions and communicate your wishes greatly increases the chances of finding a workable solution that ultimately saves the family farm.
Time to gather the troops
Families need to learn how to communicate. I recommend each family plan for three types of meetings:
1. Farm operating meetings. These occur each week so those involved in the operation, including employees, can discuss this week’s needs.
2. Farm business meetings. As a regularly scheduled strategic session, this meeting includes everyone in the family business and may include key advisers.
3. Family council meetings. No one should miss this one. Council meetings are attended by everyone in the family and occur at least once a year. The purpose is open communication, so everyone knows what is going on in the business and how it may affect family members in the future.
In my experience, family council meetings are the most difficult to get families to commit to. Why? Fear of the conflict.
Embrace family clashes
The first principle in succession planning is understanding your family is not the only one with issues. All families have conflict. Many people struggle with discussing difficult issues, but avoiding them doesn’t make them go away.
There is not one family situation where avoidance is the answer. It is always better to rip off the Band-Aid and just deal with tough situations.
That doesn’t mean, for instance, that family council meetings will be easy or fun the first time or two. They usually aren’t. But what I’ve found is once you create the habit of communicating and start working through a few sensitive issues, council meetings can actually become a time to celebrate what the family is doing together.
Rather than becoming fixated on disagreements, focusing on positive aspects and celebrating little wins can draw everyone closer together.
How much is it worth for your kids to have a better chance of sticking together as a family after you’re gone? Could you put a price on protecting family harmony and the future success of your family farm?
Start now
The greatest risk to a farm’s future isn’t commodity prices, government regulation or even finances.
While those are important, I’m convinced the No. 1 risk your farm could end when you die is whether your kids can get along after you are gone.
While you may have no control over commodity prices or interest rates, the good news is that you can affect how your kids work together in the future.
Farm meetings may not be easy, but they are worth the effort. I’m convinced this is how we save the family farm.
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