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I like March Madness, too, but not enough to get ‘snipped’ over it

According to a recent news report, more men choose this time of year, March Madness time, to get snipped, or to have that notorious progeny-pausing medical procedure known as the vasectomy.

My wife and I recently entered our 40s, and we are expecting our second child soon. Our boy is seven years old. I am not confirming or denying I’m looking into this particular medical service at this time, or am I saying that I stumbled across this CNN news story while researching the procedure on the Web in preparation for it. Okay? Fine, Okay.

If you don’t know, March Madness refers to the National Collegiate Athletic Association, or NCAA, Mens Championship basketball tournament which pretty much lasts the second half of March each year and contributes to mass gambling and lost work hours by the masses managing and participating in office-wide, tournament-bracket money-wagering pools. You can hear the collective gnashing and wailing as upsets in games spread and the tournament steamrolls to the Sweet Sixteen on its way to the athletic-A-bomb known as the Final Four each spring.

But I found it hilarious that some guys use the ‘snip’ to snap up some laying-around time to immerse deeper into the March Madness mayhem, and it has been particularly crazy so far this time around (and sorry Duke Fans, which I am one, I gotta smile when I think of the little-known Mercer Bears from Macon, Ga., beating the Blue Devil powerhouse by seven points. That was crazy).

A six-pack of something and an icepack

Like I said, I’m not confirming or denying I’m looking into this popular March Madness medical service opportunity. But I will confirm that I like basketball as much as the next fellow. Growing up, I was a complete nut for it, playing hours each day rain or shine and on teams until I snapped my ankle in high school, an impromptu adjustment to my career as a result of coming down from a layup onto the foot of a fellow teammate we called Yank (I have no idea where Yank the nickname came from, and I still to this day don’t know what Yank’s real name is).

I have spoken as of late with several friends who have had a vasectomy in recent years. Not one of them speaks glowingly of it and say that you need at least one full day if not two days to really get back on your feet after it. None timed it to coincide with March Madness, even though several are big college hoops fans. One friend did time the procedure, he said, at the end of the month to avoid having to help his single brother move out of an apartment.

Each friend said the procedure isn’t that bad but be ready to sit down for a while with a six-pack of something and a strategically placed ice pack or bag of frozen peas. I think I understand. And that reminds me, I need go check the frozen veggie situation in our freezer.

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